By: Atticus Nguyen
My Experience in Biblical Counseling
In the spring semester of 2023, I separated from the life of a sister in Christ. You could call it a break up, but the whole situation does not necessarily merit the use of that term. I will say too that in the days where I do not feel like elaborating on what happened, I usually just say that I went through a break up. How else can I explain it succinctly?
From mid-January to Spring Break in March, I couldn't sleep properly. I can count only a few days in that time period where I had a full night of uninterrupted sleep. I had flashbacks to the abuse I saw and experienced personally growing up, and I wondered if I became no different than the abusers. I pretty much spent a decent chunk of that semester on my knees and elbows everyday weeping. The young lady never hurt me, and we never crossed sexual boundaries. Yet the emotional toll of me needing to separate out of her life triggered so many questions and breakdowns on my end. The shame and guilt of my past reared their ugly heads as I went into survival mode for the rest of my sophomore year of college.
My only goal was to get back to Georgia and forget everything that happened. Of course, as is the theme of all of His redeemed peoples' lives, God had other plans for me. I found out about Biblical counseling in the fall of my sophomore year, and I found out about a Biblical counseling center in Georgia in the middle of the spring. Purely by the providence of God, the center at the church opened earlier that year, and it was in my home county. It took me a few weeks to finally fill out the intake form, but I remember submitting that form to the director of the center, not really sure what to expect. I went to Christian counseling before, and it was not helpful long term.
What followed was transformation that only God could bring. My Biblical counselor walked me through so many of the major events that bounced around my head. That counseling room at the church was where I wept, rejoiced, and pondered many of the truths taught to me. I can call my Biblical counselor a dear friend, not just a brother in Christ who listened and ministered to me every week. Biblical counseling gave me true hope and healing in the midst of darkness. As Dr. John Street puts it, “Biblical counseling put handles on my Bible.” Even though Dr. Street was talking about learning how to minister in the counseling room, I now feel the same way after being ministered to.
I knew the essentials of the gospel, reformed theology, church history, and so on. I could regurgitate facts to teach people, but I could not hold a candle to truly minister to those who were hurting. That included myself. Not that knowing of those things I listed are wrong. Every Christian should know their heritage from the Protestant Reformation, understand Biblical theology, and stand firm on gospel truth. Yet the challenge to me was: do I actually believe what the scriptures say about trials and suffering? Did I actually believe the truth in Romans 8 that all things happen for the good of those who are called according to God’s purpose? That included seeing my mother being abused and me being sexually assaulted by a gay employee of my dads and so many other instances in my life before I was saved.
I am not afraid to share my experiences because God mightily used His severe mercy to show me the sufficiency, power, and perfection of His word. I never imagined going through a season like that in college, but I would not have it any other way. My story draws parallels to that of Jacob wrestling with God. I left the spring and summer with a limp of my own in a way, but I am mightily blessed by His sanctifying work in such a condensed time. God also answered my prayer in March 2023 to have a heart posture like Job in Job 42:5-6.
“I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you; therefore I despise myself, and repent in dust and ashes.”
References
BCDASoCal. (2014, January 10). Session 1 - An Introduction to Biblical Counseling (Sept 2011) [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sIVF5XSWtM
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